Follow me
into the chrysanthemum tea ♥
あたしには あなただけよ...
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あたしには あなただけよ...
テレビに映っていた場所は（青空がきれいだった）Xindi. ( Art is my life ) twenty twelve nineteen ninety three.
今でも何処かにあって（早く 見つけてほしい）
涙こらえながら
現実に迷いながら
探しているの 次のドアを・・・
F i n d m e
What happened today? If it was the last day of your life, how satisfied would you be with your final hours?
Basically there’s nothing special happened today. I stayed at home for the whole day. Waking up, taking a bath, eat breakfast, making some crafts, and that’s it. It keeps repeating. I’ve been like this for the whole 5 months, waiting for other changes in life. Conclusion is, today is another boring day. Really boring.
If today is my last day, I won’t be surprised; instead I’d find it a bit funny. I’ve wanted to die for so many times n tried to suicide yet I’ll die without there even warnings or an attempt to die. Lol! Okay, back to the topic. If today is my last day then I won’t be satisfied, at all. I wanted to do lots of things in life, like travelling around the world, get a boyfriend, mastering 5 languages and else; there are still so many things I can and will achieve. I haven’t lived my life to the fullest, and if it’s going to be my ‘game over’ tonight… I don’t know, I might roam in this world since I haven’t feel satisfied in living.
And I haven’t got the chance to tell my families, and friends about how much I love them. I haven’t got the chance to tell them the truths how they have hurt and made me happy. Sadly, I can hardly show affection because affection is a weakness for me; especially for the one I love the most. I can never tell ‘I love you mom and dad!’ because it feels like a shame to me. I know I shouldn’t think this way but I can never tell them until I-don’t-know-when.
So, yea, I won’t let today becomes my last day. There are still many things I’ve got to do.